My blatant commercialism tarnishes religion, right?

I enjoy Christmas... It is the day when devout Christians all over America and most parts of the world celebrate the birth of their savior in the person of Jesus Christ. I’m never quite sure exactly how I should feel about Christmas, and I vacillate between embracing certain parts of it and rejecting it in its entirety.

I am a materialist. By that, I do not mean that I put high values on material objects, but simply that my epistemology demands that I have evidence for the things that I believe. When a Christian tells me of their God, the stories sound nice, the morals frequently good (though occasionally shockingly awful), and the mindset of love and peace a heart-warming concept. But at the same time, I have no idea of what they speak. I’ve never seen a god. I’ve never heard one, or reached out my hands and touched one. I have yet to smell or taste a deity.

I’ve prayed. I’ve been to dozens of churches of many different sects and varieties. I’ve read the Bible cover to cover a half dozen times, as well as the Qu’ran, the Book of Mormon, the Bhagavad Gita, and a host of other religious texts. I have done all of this and I have never felt anything. I’ve never been filled with a sense of love and justice. I’ve never been filled with a sense of belonging and peace. To my knowledge I have not been touched by a divine spirit (although I’m not sure I would know what such an experience would even feel like).

Because I am (by default, I suppose) not a religious person, celebrating Christmas seems somehow wrong on a very important level. To other people, the purpose of the holiday is to celebrate a profoundly important ritual in the church calendar, namely, the commemoration of the birth of the incarnation (probably the wrong word, but I’ve tried in vain to come up with a better one) of godhood on Earth. The very word ‘holiday’ etymologically stems from ‘holy day.’

The parts of celebrating Christmas which I enjoy and wish to embrace involve sharing my time with my family and friends (although I think I have yet to celebrate a Christmas with friends instead of or along with family). I enjoy purchasing presents for people in my life who mean a great deal to me, and search for gifts which I believe make a distinctive statement about my relationship with that person. I relish the time when I get to see the people I cherish be gladdened by thoughtful gifts they receive and delight in amassing my own little pile of holiday gifts on the living room floor.

But all of these things are a commercialization of Christmas, aren’t they? Christmas is Christ’s Mass (origin: Roman Catholicism), and should have a religious overtone rather than one of personal satisfaction at material gain. While celebrating the things that I value about Christmas seems good, I must confront the idea that they detract from the real purpose of the holiday for the people who invented the holiday in the first place.

I can value the people in my life on any day of the year. Why should I damage a very ritualistically important event in the church calendar to do so? I don’t know the answer to that question. As usual, my mind is asking questions and answering them in ways which refuse to synch up with my intuitions and socialization.